Wednesday, February 08, 2006 @ 7:09 PM
as i was spending my quiet time, i was very deep into the worship. i was simply amazed by him and i felt like i could go on forever. then, without knocking or whatsoever, my mum opened the door and entered my room, and i stopped worshipping. in my heart, i was panicking, like, Lord, wait, wait, kayy? sorry Lord! please wait!
then my mum left without closing the door. feeling, "ahhh!" not irritated or bitterness, jus this... ahhh. Lord, wait!!! thingie feeling, i went back to worship. as i continued, my mum shouted and asked if i wanted to eat. i didn't reply because i really just want to worship Him. then, she asked again and i felt that if i don't reply, she'll probably come in again. so i shouted, "YAR. EATING LATER!"
and i went back to worship, crying. i told myself not to cry, but the tears just came.
i felt as if my mum was stopping me from getting closer to God, and i really don't want to leave Him. and i prayed to God that no matter what kind of circumstance, let NOTHING, just NOTHING hinder my relationship with Him. let my love for Him be so strong, that NOTHING can stop me from drawing closer and closer to God. NOTHING shall stop me from loving Him more, to knowing Him more, to getting closer to Him.
i told God i really, really, want to have this closesness between us. and God gently told me He is pleased with me and He will Bless me. not only will He draw me nearer to Him, but He will also Bless me with fruits. people will come and the group will grow. my love for people, joy in Him, patience in situations, self-control to prioritise my time, my kindness and gentleness to people, my faith in Him and even my wisdom for the Word. they will all increase. He assured me that as long as i desire for Him, He will Bless me greatly, for He is pleased with me.
thank you God. amen.